At a fabric store, a pretty girl spots a nice material for a dress and asks the male clerk: How much does it costs? “Only one kiss per yard,” replied the male clerk with a smirk. “That’s fine,” said the girl. I’ll take ten yards.” With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, the […]
This one is cute and funny! _______________________________________________ Three guys go in for a job interview, all at the same office. The first one goes in for his interview and the interviewer says, “What’s the first thing you see when you look at me?” The guy says, “That’s not too hard, you’ve got no ears.” The […]
A teacher sees a lad entering the classroom – his hands were dirty. She stopped him and said, “John, please wash your hands. My goodness, what would you say if I came into the room with hands like that?” Smiling the boy replied, “I think I’d be too polite to mention it.” ————————————————————- Joke is […]
A tour bus driver drives with a bus full of seniors down a highway, when a little old lady taps him on his shoulder. She offers him a handful of almonds, which he gratefully munches up. After approx.15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of almonds. She […]
An Antartian boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again. The boy asked his father, “What is this, Father?” The father [never having seen an elevator] responded “Son, I have never seen […]
A policeman parked his police van in front of the station. While gathering his equipment, his K-9 partner Tops was barking and he saw a little boy staring in at him. “Is that a dog you got back there?” he asked. “It sure is,” the policeman replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at him and towards […]
Computers can never replace humans. They may become capable of artificial intelligence, but they will never master real stupidity. Joke courtesy of AJokeADay.com.
I received these in an email and thought they were so funny, I just had to share them with you! Which one is your favorite?? ADULT REALIZATIONS 1. I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die. 2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during […]
Peter says. Doctor, I see double! Sit on the chair please the doctor says. Which one? Peter replied. Joke courtesy of AJokeADay.com.
A newsboy was standing on the corner with a stack of papers, yelling, “Read all about it; Fifty people swindled! Fifty people swindled!” Curious, a man walked over, bought a paper, and said, “Hey kid, this is an old paper, where’s the story about the big swindle?” The newsboy ignored him and went on calling […]
The top toothbrush salesman at the company was asked by his boss how he managed to sell so many brushes. He replied “It’s easy” and he pulled out his card table, setting his display of brushes on top. He told his boss, I lay the brushes out like this, and then I put out some […]
A little girl asked her mother, “Can I go outside and play with the boys?” Her mother replied, “No, you can’t play with the boys, they’re too rough.” The little girl thought about it for a few moments and asked, “If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?” Joke is courtesy […]
While Bill waited at the airport to board his plane, he noticed a computer scale that would give your weight and a fortune. He dropped a quarter in the slot, and the computer screen displayed: “You weigh 195 pounds, you are married and you’re on your way to San Diego.” Bill stood there dumbfounded. Another […]
A man had been crossing a street when a car slammed into him. The pedestrian sued the motorist, whose lawyer made the following statement at the end of the trial. “Your honor, my client was not at fault. He has been driving a car for thirty years, and has never had an accident, nor gotten […]
A pilot landed a plane with a rather bumpy landing. As part of his job he was required to stand by the terminal door and say goodbye to the passengers as they exited the airplane. He was afraid that someone might say something about his rather less than perfect landing, but everyone left without saying […]